Happy is the arising of the Buddhas; happy is the teaching of the true Dhamma; happy is the unity of the Sangha; happy is the discipline of the united ones. – Dhammapada (verses 194–195)
The ordained sangha is the heartbeat of the Buddhadharma—it’s what keeps the dharma alive for this generation and beyond. Over the decades of studying with Kyabje Lama Zopa Rinpoche, I’ve made close friendships with many FPMT monastics and they—each and every one—have been of great inspiration to me.
I know that in this life I had marriage vows to keep and therefore monastic vows were out of the question. However, I always felt that I’d like to create the causes for being a monastic in my next life, before becoming enmeshed in family life if that’s what my next life had in store for me. And I already had lay vows from Kyabje Chöden Rinpoche 25 years ago, so…
Why monastic vows?
Kyabje Lama Zopa Rinpoche, one of my two root gurus (along with Ven. René Feusi), always spoke of the great benefits of living in monastic vows. Living in vows creates immense merit: “One moment of living in the vows purely is more merit than building many stupas, more than making offerings to the Buddhas.” It is the best protection from suffering: “It’s like building a fortress of virtue around your mind.” And “to take ordination and live in vows, even for one day, is so unbelievably rare and meaningful. It’s more precious than all the jewels of the world.”
In one of my recent retreats I realized that for 30 years I have been saying the refuge and bodhicitta prayer and only rarely was I not just mouthing the words. I had taken the bodhisattva vows; if my goal really was to reach enlightenment for the benefit of all sentient beings, don’t I have the responsibility to get there as quickly as possible to relieve their suffering? And if accumulation of merit and purification of obstacles are necessary to get there and monastic vows are so meritorious, then shouldn’t I consider monastic vows?
I thought about the many sufferings in our world other than the obvious endemic poverty of basic necessities: the poverty of security, poverty of trust, poverty of correct direction, poverty of loneliness, poverty of certainty, poverty of wisdom, poverty of a meaningful life, poverty of self-esteem, and on and on. If I follow my guru’s advice and am able to make a dent in this vast ocean of poverty, then I should try to take monastic vows.
Moreover, I’ve got a good set-up: I’m already retired and spend most of my time in retreat, my needs are taken care of, my family supports me in my endeavors. I have no obstacles. I felt that the Buddhas were offering me this opportunity on a silver platter and refusing it would be like spitting in their faces; or as the poor farmer in the lam rim who kept looking for gold everywhere not knowing that under his floor was a wish-fulfilling precious gem.
How did it happen?
I have been continuing my personal study and retreats following Lama Zopa Rinpoche’s advice. Because of that I had developed a feeling of clear purpose, urgency, and devotion. Coincidentally sometime last year—or maybe because there was some outward indication of inner progress—my wife asked whether I had considered becoming a monastic (it has been something we had discussed over the years). To be honest, I really hadn’t, since I assumed that we’d have to dissolve our marriage. I had never intended to trade one set of vows for another.
In October last year, I was at a retreat with my last remaining vajra master in this life, Gyumed Khensur Rinpoche Lobsang Jampa, an incredibly pure being and a great master of sutra and tantra like Lama Tsongkhapa himself. I asked whether I could stay legally married, live in the same house, and still take monastic vows. He said “Of course, with three conditions: 1) you have to keep your [celibacy] vows pure, 2) your wife has to agree, and 3) you have to continue to have a harmonious relationship.” This was special advice: if you want to practice Buddhadharma, you mustn’t create harm to another to take your monastic vows.
My wife, Deirdre, who has been an incredible support in my Dharma practice and service to centers throughout my life, as well as having worked at Vajrapani when I was SPC and followed the dharma path in her own way, was again entirely supportive. In this I’m very fortunate; Lama Zopa used to speak of the immense benefit of having a harmonious family and the merit that becomes the cause for having that benefit.
I asked for advice from Ven. George Churinoff, a great scholar, teacher, friend, and spiritual mentor, and he said it would be of great benefit to become a monastic. And my remaining root guru, Ven. René Feusi, who is in full time retreat, sent his characteristically short “I think it is a great idea for you to become monk, but yes find a way that makes it go harmoniously with Deirdre and your children” email.
I told our kids of my intention; I was taken aback to get a collective “I’m not surprised” as a reaction… but they were happy! After 30-odd years nothing is of surprise to them.
Finally, Deirdre and I had gotten used to the idea, in March I went to California to formally ask Rinpoche for ordination. On the way, when stopping for gas on the interstate, I saw a double rainbow above the gas station: this was a good sign. When I finally had the meeting with him (with Geshe Tashi, his attendant translating), he just said “When do you want to do it?” I, in my characteristic cheekiness, said “In this life would be nice.” He answered: “How about in two weeks?” At that I just sat there and stared at G. Tashi who also stared back at me; my first thought was “where the hell am I going to get robes?!” Clearly, I couldn’t say no.
It turns out that he suggested that date because one of his students, a great master, current abbot of Sera Mey Monastery, Sharpa Choeje Rinpoche Ngawang Jorden was going to be there with his attendant. This fulfilled the requirement of having at least four senior monks of at least ten years as witnesses, plus the preceptor; this is part of the lineage as specified by the Buddha. (Actually, it’s ten monastics, but if you’re in a “faraway land” like in the West, you’re allowed to get by with four.)
You can’t find robes in the US; it’s not an item on Amazon. A frantic world wide search for robes began immediately; sitting in the car outside Rinpoche’s house I called all the monks and nuns I know in Europe, India, Nepal, and the US to see if any knew of some way to get some novice monk robes. To make a long story short, through the kindness of many monastics I was able to come up with some hand-me-down robes sent by expedited post. Ven. Tendar, Director of the International Mahayana Institute—the FPMT monastics’ organization—had some made to size in Nepal and has sent them; it’s in the post as of this writing.
I told a few very close dharma friends of my impending ordination and all were ecstatic. That is so wonderful: to have friends in the dharma who encourage you along the way, and help you when you need help is a great privilege. Ven. George, Ven. René and my dharma friends were all going to dedicate their prayers for my ordination, especially on the day.
Ordination
My robes, ready to be offered in front of me.
I showed up on April 3 at 9:30am at Rinpoche’s house in San Jose. I didn’t know it at the time, but Rinpoche was in the middle of a retreat; so it was incredibly kind of him to take an entire morning session and spend it with me. Also, it’s rare to have only one person getting ordained, usually there are at least a half dozen or so.
So all in all, his kindness showed through again. He and Jorden Rinpoche did the preliminary prayers and then a half hour later asked me to join them. I was a bit nervous; I really didn’t know what to expect. They had told me to wear my normal clothes and bring the robes. Geshe Gelek (another disciple of Khensur Rinpoche) took my robes and folded them carefully for presenting to Rinpoche.
I don’t remember a lot of the details of the actual ordination, it was mostly a blur with Geshe Tashi translating the words as said by Khensur Rinpoche and explaining what was going on. I do know that I was first given again the five lay vows: no killing, stealing, sexual misconduct, lying and getting intoxicated. Then I was given the 36 pratimoksha vows of the novice monk, which includes no sexual behavior at all and no taking of any intoxicants.
I knelt on one knee in front of Rinpoche and answered various questions required to gauge whether the student is qualified and offered him my robes one by one for him to bless. Finally, he gave me my new name Lobsang Phuntsog; as translated by Ven. George, Noble Mind of Abundant Excellence.
Then they told me to put on my blessed robes; the attendant geshes helped me put them on. One of the vows I took was of forsaking all jewelry; which means that I can’t wear a wedding ring. I knew it beforehand, but forgot to take the ring off. So in the bathroom I desperately tried to take it off with the hand soap, to no avail. I came back rather embarrassed; Rinpoche just had a good laugh and said “take it off later on when you can.” That’s how I always found him: always kind and cheerful. (Later my wife helped me pull the ring off.)
Finally, I was given the official time off my ordination: April 3, 2025 at 11:30am Pacific. Anyone ordained before that time is senior to me.
I gave a thanksgiving offering of a tabletop 6-inch prayer wheel to Rinpoche made by my dear friend and Lama Yeshe student, Chuck Thomas. He filled it with 3 billion Chenrezig, Manjushri and migstema mantras to represent Lama Tsongkhapa who has appeared to me in human form as Rinpoche (we couldn’t find Vajrapani mantras). The offering seemed to please his holy mind.
I ordered lunch for the two Rinpoches and all the attendant sangha from their favorite Indian restaurant and we all had a wonderful lunch. Then Gyumed Khensur Rinpoche went off to his retreat session after saying goodbye.
I sent a picture afterward of me standing with Rinpoche to my family; Deirdre said when she saw it a gong went off in her heart saying this is SO right! I felt the same way.
I feel fortunate beyond all bounds, truly fortunate. I have had Lama Zopa Rinpoche, Gyumed Khensur Rinpoche, Chöden Rinpoche, Ven. René, and many other great masters as my teachers and this was the fruition of all their blessings and whatever little true effort I made.
I hope to take full ordination (gelong vows) in maybe a year or two. Rinpoche said I should do it with His Holiness, but I might ask Rinpoche again. Rinpoche is 90 years old and I don’t know how much longer my karma will hold that he continues to be with us. If at all possible, I’d like to strengthen my karmic connection with him, my last vajra guru, so that I can continue to meet him in all my future lives.
In short, I seek your blessings, my savior, to be guided
By you from birth inseparably throughout all my lives,
And thus to become your main disciple,
Holding every secret of your holy body, speech, and mind.
Savior, please grant that all be auspicious for me
To be foremost among your very first circle of disciples
wherever you manifest buddhahood,
So that all my temporal and ultimate wishes, without exception,
May be effortlessly and spontaneously fulfilled
– Lama Chöpa
